Is there anything wrong with hooking up with more than 1 girl at the same time?

Alex says ‘there’s this girl, Lucy that I’ve kind of been hooking up with for a while now, maybe 5 weeks and it’s all very casual, no strings attached. Now I think I like this other girl, Annie, but I can’t really make up my mind so I want to date both of them at the same time… is that ok?’


I’m not gonna lie Alex, it's a bad idea. You are setting yourself up for a sure-fire fail with Lucy, because she’s not going to hang around for very long once she finds out you’re dating someone else. No one wants to be a sideckick. If they are friends and find out that you’re messing both of them around, they will come at you in joined forces and make your life less than fun. If the thing with Lucy is casual then do yourself a favour and just end it with her first, and say that you guys are better as friends, and you are then free to date whoever you want without complicating matters and creating a messy love triangle.



A common view:

‘Hey why not! Variety and quantity are the spice of life! So long as you don’t get caught, go for it and date/hook up with as many gals as you like’.

My view:

I don’t subscribe to that view.

You want a ‘situationship’ with Lucyi.e. a chilled relationship with casual sex but not want to be officially together.  Hooking up with Annie at the same time will end in tears, especially if Lucy and Annie are chums. It is wiser and less complicated to just have a platonic relationship with Annie for now until you decide you want to hook up with her instead at a later date if you realise that you do prefer her to Lucy (you may not!!).  If so, then ‘unhook’ from Lucy at the later date.

Most open relationships are very emotionally complicated, and I think it is tacky to hook up with 2 girls at the same time!

Ally Mackintosh